I want to learn new things. I want to be good at different kinds of music instruments also at different languages. I want to indulge myself to lot of things.

Insecurities


I feel like I wouldn't be able to cope up with this society anymore. I show them that I am not inferior. I can't.
But what should I do? I feel like if anyone will just look at me, I am about to cry.

This feeling that you must show your smile even you can't hold your tears anymore.
It's hard.
No one knows this feeling.
Even if they do, would they care?

Accept it. Unless you are in this position, you wouldn't really care.

All For You

All for you

It’s already been a few days since you haven’t called

Do you know that it’s my birthday soon?

But time keeps ticking without concern

Because I was more worried than annoyed

I went to the entrance of your street without planning it

I didn’t think I’d see you but you greeted me with a smile

Actually, I worried about this a lot

Because I had nothing I could do for you

Even though I lack so much and I don’t have much

Will you still accept me?

For you, only for you

I might not be able to give you the whole world but

Now I will promise only to you

I will be a person who is only for you

It’s only for you just wanna be for you

You just need to stay by my side just as you are right now

Even if I’m born again, I want to look at only you forever

You don’t know but it was a bit hard for me

Am I the right person for you?

And even if I’m not the one but it’s another person

I want to throw away that feeling now

For you, only for you

I might not be able to give you the whole world but

Now I will promise only to you

I will be a person who is only for you

It’s only for you just wanna be for you

You just need to stay by my side just as you are right now

Even if I’m born again, I want to look at only you forever

(Love – in my small heart – oh love – I want to fill it up with your scent)

So even if I’m eternally trapped inside

I can be happy

For you, only for you

I might not be able to give you the whole world but

Now I will promise only to you

I will be a person who is only for you

It’s only for you

Oh oh it’s all for you

Romanized:

All for you ~

Beolsseo myeochiljjae jeonhwado eomneun neo

Eolma humyeon naui saengil iran geol aneunji

Nunchido eobsi siganeun jakkuman heulleogago

Nan miumboda geokjeongseureon mame

Mujakjeong chajagan neoui golmok eogwieseo

Saenggakji motan useumyeo bangineun neoreul bwasseo

Sasireun mallya na manhi gominhaesseo

Nege amugeotdo haejul su eomneungeol

Aju manhi mojarado gajin geot eobseodo

Ireon narado bada jullae

Neoreul wihaeseo neomaneul wihaeseo

Nan sesang modeun geol da angyeo jujineun motajiman

Nan neoegeman ije yaksokhalge

Ojik neoreul wihan naega doelge

Is only for you just wanna be for you

Neon geureoke jigeum moseup geudaero nae gyeote isseumyeon dwae

Nan dasi taeeonado yeongwonhi neoman barabolge

Neon moreujiman jogeumeun himdeureosseo

Nege eoullineun sarami nainji

Geugeon naega anirado dareun nugurado

Ijen geureon maeum beorillae

Neoreul wihaeseo neomaneul wihaeseo

Nan sesang modeun geol da angyeo jujineun motajiman

Nan neoegeman ije yaksokhalge

Ojik neoreul wihan naega doelge

Is only for you just wanna be for you

Neon geureoke jigeum moseup geudaero nae gyeote isseumyeon dwae

Nan dasi taeeonado yeongwonhi neoman barabolge

(love nae jageun mamsogeul oh love ne hyanggiro chaeullae)

Geu soge yeongwonhi gatyeo beorin dedo

Nan haengbok hal su itdorok

Neoreul wihaeseo neomaneul wihaeseo

Nan sesang modeun geol da angyeo jujineun motajiman

Nan neoegeman ije yaksokhalge

Ojik neoreul wihan naega doelge

Is only for you ~

Oh oh is all for you

Translation Credits: pop!gasa 
Romanizations by: kpoplyrics.net

Things I want to do if I had a lover

Romaji Lyric

Namjachinguga sengimyon hago shipdon il nomuna mana nan nul kumul guwoso
Chot bonje kilgorieso kisuhe bogi du bonje marya chunchonheng sebyok kicha
se bonje sopung gagi ne bonje dunge ophigi dasot bonje kopulingun kibon
boo boo boo jongmal dalkomhal koya

We iroke dugun dugun dugun dweni sengakman hedo
Han gajishik meil meil meil nowa da he bol koya
Nan nega iso haruga julgowo ijenun duriranun ge
Ne sojunghan no baby baby baby boo~

Yojachinguga sengimyon hago shipdon il negedo mana hangsang burowo heso
Yosot je shimyayonghwa ilkop je nolidongsando yodop bonje kamjak ibentudo
boo boo boo jongmal hengbokhal koya

We iroke dugun dugun dugun dweni sengakman hedo
Han gakishik meil meil meil nowa da he bol koya
Nan nega iso haruga julgowo ijenun duriranun ge
Ne sojunghan no baby baby baby baby boo~

Honjayotdon sengiri haril opdon jumari
Irum butun nalduri ijen kidaryojwo

Duriraso chowa hamkeraso chowa
Odie inunji do muwol hadunji nowa

Na gu junge jeil jeil jeil hago shipdon han gaji
Nol saranghe gu mal gu mal gumal han bon marhe bonun il
Nol saranghe ku mal ku mal kumal han bon duro bonun il
Nege wa jwoso nomuna gomawo negyote nega inunge
Namane sarang baby baby baby baby boo
baby baby baby baby boo~

Translation Lyric

There are so many things I’ve wanted to do once I had a boyfriend, I’ve always dreamed
First, kissing on the street, second, you see, is a train to ChoonChun at dawn
Third, going on a picnic, fourth, getting a piggyback ride, fifth, couple rings are standard
boo boo boo it would be really sweet

Why does my heart beat thump thump simply at the thought
I’m going to do each of things daily daily daily with you
My day is enjoyable because I have you, now that the two of us are together
My precious you, baby baby baby baby boo~

There are so many things I’ve also wanted to do once I had a girlfriend, I’ve always been envious
Sixth, late night movie, seventh, amusement park too, eighth, surprise event too
boo boo boo, I would be really happy

Why does my heart beat thump thump simply at the thought
I’m going to do each of things daily daily daily with you
My day is enjoyable because I have you, now that the two of us are together
My precious you, baby baby baby baby boo~

My once lonely birthdays, boring weekends
I now await labeled days

I like that it’s the two of us, I like that we’re together
Wherever I am, whatever I’m doing with you

The one thing I’ve wanted to do most most most out of those things

“I love you,” saying those words those words those words just once
“I love you,” hearing those words those words those words just once
Thank you so much for coming to me, you being by my side
My love, baby baby baby baby boo~
baby baby baby baby boo~

source: makikawaii-jklyrics

Today, I'm studying French and it makes me crazy. My goal now, is to be fluent in French.

http://www.interactive-audiotexts.com/manual.php

http://www.macmillandictionary.com/dictionary/british/

Regret. Forget. MoveOn. Live

         There is something that bothers me. The past. I don't want to regret it but... I am regretting it. I regret all the things I've done-- all the thoughts I've thought-- all the feelings I felt. I regret every minute of it. I regret   liking him, being his friend... and falling unto him. I regret that I dropped my standards. Now? The feeling that I feel before meeting him suddenly came back. How? Why? Yoon Shi Yoon. He gave me this feeling back. He is making my life confused. I am really really falling unto Shi Yoon. You think it's a joke? Or a fandom? No. I really do like him. Not as an actor. As a man. I felt this with Chinen and Miura before. 

I miss Chii. :))

I am serious.

When I say I love you, I am serious. Especially on a friend. I have lots of friends but I cherish few. I am not fond of putting all my efforts and trust for a friend but when I do, those are the people I don't want to lose.
It's not that I can't leave without them but with them, it would be happier. I rarely say I love you or I miss you. So when I say it, I really mean it. I don't just say it for fun or what. I am sweet yes. Especially when it comes to friends I really cherish. I am fond of hugging them, holding and clinging unto them.

I often miss my closest friends so badly. I often think of them. I talk about them to my other friends. I don't know if they are treating me as their best friend but as for me, they are more than that. I feel like they are my sisters and brothers.

People may not find me serious. They think that I'm always joking and I'm always being childish. Well, most of the time, especially whenever I'm with my friends, I find myself mischievous, but serious. I am serious about my affection to them.

Today, I decided to do my best. Not to lose to myself. I don't want to lose. I don't want to feel defeated again.

I miss my hair this long. ahaha.
Well, As of now, I'm not going to talk about my lovely hair. (What's with the lovely?) ahahha !

I decided to update more on my blog. I haven't done that since I made this blog and I am really sorry for my lovely blog. ahhaha. I want to see this blog more often.

I got my new hairstyle. Well, I cut it myself this last Monday. Nothing special. I always do this kind of thing. Whenever I see scissors, I unconsciously cut my hair. It's just below shoulder so it's not so short.
But I think maybe, this will be the beginning of the changes in my life. Yeah. I will change myself. Why? I want to prove something. I want to prove that I am not someone that others can just criticize or down.

I actually never intend to do something like this but then, last Friday, I told myself that I will make them regret the things that they did and told something bad about me.

"Basta next time, pag magkaka crush ka dapat yung mas gwapo sakin o yung matatalo ako sa pagsolve ng mystery problems."

And that's it. We are back to being friends again. Forgot the past. Erase the awkwardness. Haha, we are talking about what happened so casually now. It's been a year and a half !  I want to thank him and apologize to him like what he did to me. I formally saying

Thank you and I am very sorry.
I have my own faults. I think you should put the blame on me for creating the awkwardness between us.
But as I said, before I saw someone with much higher standards than yours, I won't have a crush on someone again.

I feel okay now. After we settled it, now, I'm feeling great.